In this essay I speak about the need to put the patient first when discussing the relationship between the patient and the doctor. From my own experience of having been a cancer patient, I argue that most patients appreciate and feel empowered by knowledge about their illness if this knowledge is given sensitively. I also try to explain why doctors need to recognise and respond sensitively to the patient's need to be healed, psychologically, as well, especially in cases of serious or chronic illnesses.